Don’t Hate the Player, Just Don’t Play the Game

Therefore all things whatsoever that men should do to you, do  even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets. Matthew 7:12

“Don’t hate the player; hate the game.”

….But seriously, stay away from the player.

I know what you’re thinking: ‘Mads, that is the most cliche statement you have ever said”

I’m sorry, but it’s true. So many people play a game with others hearts, that was never meant to be played. And not only are these people guilty but in the long run, we also are guilty of letting them drag us along.

Here’s the kicker (sorry bad sports pun), These “players” come in so many disguises. Some are very sincere, charming, and even spiritual, and some are open about it- nonchalant in the fact that they treat others badly. I often, have a gut sense about these types of people which I ignore because I want the attention, or I think that I can change them, but let me tell you right now,  people like this are NEVER going to truly commit to you.

I am calling a time out (haha I did it again) on this post already, I know that you have probably read something like this or one of your good friends has explained it to you when you became interested in someone who doesn’t have your best interest in mind. But I am calling out not only guys, who I feel typically get this label, but also girls.

I know, you’re sitting behind your screen and you’re like WHAT?! shocking.

Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another. Romans 12:10

So here is my heart behind this post: We as Christians can simply avoid so much heartache by being smart about who we let into the intimate parts of our minds.

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Ok, so what are some of the “red flags”? (LOL I love puns)

First, when things start too fast. Don’t let your emotional needs get in the way of your brain. Secondly, if your significant other only wants to talk on their terms. You should be more than a convenience in their life, they should make you a priority. Third, you should never be a secret. That’s some real sketchy business. Fourth, if they refuse to talk about commitment. If the person wants to be with you and you are building a relationship that is glorifying Christ, commitment shouldn’t be scary.

Put on therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, bowels of mercies, kindness, humbleness of mind, meekness, longsuffering; Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye. And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness. Colossians 3:12-14

The last and most honest point I want to make is, if the person is not committed to being everything they are called to be in Christ, they are not the person for you. 

I don’t mean to be cliche (double play..sorry puns are just too good), but how would Jesus treat the women around him if he were to date? If you are not going to commit, let them know and let them go. You can not serve yourself and God. Save YOUR heart and time and emotions, treat people right, and if you do, then you will receive the best for you that God has to offer. Good things come to those who wait.

So girls, don’t lead guys on because you know they are a nice guy when you don’t have intentions of sticking around when feelings develop. And guys, the same goes to you. Don’t play the dating game of who’s talking to whom and what it means to go FBO (hey mom, that means facebook official) or what it means when they post a picture of you together on Instagram.

I know I am clearly no expert in the dating world, but my mom sure has expressed what it means to protect my heart and the hearts of those around me.

This is my commandment, That you love one another, as I have loved you. John 15:12

So go play games, I like soccer, baseball, and lacrosse.. Also board games are fun. But don’t play the dating game that the world has created.

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If you want more on my perspective on singleness check out my post, Embrace your relationship status.

Y’all rock.



I would love to get to know y’all and I have gotten e-mails about doing a questionnaire blog. So, if you would like to ask a question that I could ask for next weeks blog do it…


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